MFTIV: Ch 64

  It was raining heavily outside.

    Qi An’an was trembling a little, and whispered: “Okay, I’ll go out and kneel,” she raised her head hurriedly, “How long will you kneel before you let me go?”

    Jiang Lu did not answer, his eyes with obvious disgust, stood up and walked back to the office. At the table, it seemed that he didn’t want to look at her more.

    Qi An’an walked outside with her hollow eyes open. She didn’t have an umbrella and let the rain pour on her body. Slowly turned to face the direction of the door, and slowly knelt down.

    The color of the sky was drowsy, and the heavy rain lasted from morning to night without a break in between.

    When the night was dark, when Jiang Lu walked out of the building under an umbrella, Qi An’an was still kneeling on the outside steps, her lips were white and pink, and her body was very weak, as if she would faint in the next moment.

    Seeing Jiang Lu walking by without squinting, she didn’t even care about her. Qi An’an got up anxiously, but fell to the ground unsteadily. She quickly reached out and touched Jiang Lu’s trousers.

    I bumped into it, but I didn’t have the strength to hold it.

    But Jiang Lu stopped.

    Qi An’an was soaked in the rain, looking at him embarrassedly in the rain, and then tried to stretch out his hand forward: “Are you calm?”

    Jiang Lu took a step back, Qi An’an’s hand weakly fell into the puddle on the ground.

    His eyes were extremely cold, he tilted his head slightly, and the smile at the corner of his mouth was cold: “No.”

    … When

    Jiang Lu opened his eyes, it was raining outside.

    It was also the sound of rain, but at the moment it was not as cold as in the dream. He was lying on the soft bed with a warm body in his arms.

    But his heart was extremely cold, falling straight and straight down.

    He seemed to be stuck in the dream just now and couldn’t get out. He stretched out his hand to support An An countless times, but failed countless times in despair.

    He punched his face hard, but to no avail.

    He wanted to make him awake, open his eyes and take a good look, how could he treat An An like this? !

    But all is in vain.

    The heart in his chest seemed to have been shattered into powder by the dream just now, and he couldn’t even piece it together.

    He had always been afraid of his nightmares, for fear that the scenes in the dreams would become reality, so he acted fiercely and perversely, eradicating all the people who might threaten him one by one, but in the end he discovered that the person who hurt An’an originally –

    Jiang Lu eyes closed.

    It’s himself.

    Jiang Lu lowered his head to look at the girl sleeping in his arms. Her sleep was still so innocent and delicate, and she trusted him in her arms, as if this was the safest place in the world.

    He blinked, tears ran across the bridge of his nose quickly, and sank into the pillow.

    If it was just a dream, he would not be as desperate as he is now. He will tell himself that this is an absurd dream, which will never happen in reality.

    But the scary thing is that from that moment on, Jiang Lu realized that everything was not just a dream. He had a vague memory: he remembered that he had sat on that sofa and looked condescendingly at the person kneeling at his feet. , Zeng said to her coldly and softly.

    ……Why?

    Why did they end up like this? This is the only person he cares about in this world. It is the only light in his dark life. All the softness and warmth in his life are given by An An. How could he treat her like that?

    An An smiled at him, and he could die for her.

    His baby is so good, but why did he become an executioner in the end?

    Jiang Lu’s lips trembled, and tears rolled silently.

    His breathing became calm, Qi An’an was confused and a little awake: “Jiang Lu, what’s wrong with you… are you cold… why are you shaking…”

    She was too sleepy, closed her eyes and stretched out her hand to explore the corner of the quilt, and lifted it up to help Jiang Lu cover her back.

    Jiang Lu felt Qi An’an’s warm little hands help him tuck the quilt, but the panic and pain made him completely muffled at this moment.

    Qi An’an unconsciously patted Jiang Lu, stretched his hand back to touch his hand, frowned under the touch, but opened half of his eyes this time when he was sleepy: “Jiang Lu… why are your hands so cold? Bring the other one over.”

    She was half asleep and half awake, with a sweet smile in her voice: “This time it’s my turn to cover your hand…”

    Jiang Lu didn’t dare to move, he was afraid of making big moves. After awakening Qi An’an completely, she will definitely find herself crying, and when asked, he can’t answer at all.

    In this way, Jiang Lu fell asleep again while Qi An’an clenched his hand, and then quietly got up.

    *

    Jiang Lu stood in front of the bathroom mirror, looking at his pale face under the warm yellow light.

    He thought of the middle-aged woman who sold lamps and said to him: “This color is good, it’s bright and it doesn’t hurt your eyes. The light of this color at home is very warm. If your lover did not come with you today, it’s not wrong to buy this. She will like it.”

    He also thought it was good at the time, but now standing under the light, his face is still like a ghost, making him shudder.

    Obviously before going to sleep, his heart was still full of peace and happiness, but at this moment he fell from the clouds to hell.

    The vague memory in his mind seemed to be clearer again, Jiang Lu could even remember the sound of water splashes under his feet when he walked past Qi An’an.

    He slowly raised his hand, his fingertips lightly touched the mirror surface, and he looked at himself in the mirror with a bleak smile.

    “Am I crazy…”

    …

    After waking up the next morning, Qi Anan found that there was no one.

    Jiang Lu unexpectedly got up so early, Qi Anan glanced at the time, and it was only after six o’clock, but he was not around, and she couldn’t sleep anymore, so she got up and went downstairs.

    Jiang Lu was sitting on the sofa in the living room, his eyes were a little empty, he stared forward blankly, not knowing what he was thinking, when he heard the movement, he raised his eyes and stood up from the sofa all of a sudden.

    “An An…”

    Jiang Lu realized that his voice was dumb as soon as he spoke. After clearing his throat, he continued: “An An, why do you get up so early? I haven’t cooked breakfast yet, I’m going now.”

    “Hey, wait. “Qian’an pulled Jiang Lu, “What’s the matter? Why is your complexion so bad? Are you sick?”

    Jiang Lu has a faint blue mark under his eyes, his complexion is also pale, and his condition is very poor. If two people.

    Qi An’an looked distressed, and reached out to touch Jiang Lu’s forehead. He didn’t have a fever.

    “Is my complexion very bad?” Jiang Lu pulled Qi An’an’s hand down and smiled lightly at her, “It’s okay, maybe it’s just getting up too early. It will be fine after I wash and eat after a while.”

    He withered. Sit in the middle of the night, thinking about your complexion that shouldn’t be much better. It’s just that Qi An’an would wake up so early, so he should organize his own in advance.

    Qi An’an didn’t feel that Jiang Lu’s state didn’t seem to be a physical illness, but rather it seemed that he had suffered a blow. Although Jiang Lu had occasionally been spotted by her when he was worried, it was definitely not the state it is today.

    Qi An’an stopped Jiang Lu from letting him go: “Jiang Lu, is something wrong? If something happens, don’t hide it from me. I’m not a kid, so I can take it with you.”

    Jiang Lu’s heart drama Pain, the more Qi An’an cared so tenderly, the more he felt suffocated.

    Jiang Lu took a deep breath, burying all his emotions deep in his heart, Qi An’an showed a gentle and undifferentiated smile: “It’s really okay, An’an, don’t worry.”

    He secretly bit the tip of his tongue, tasting the smell of blood. He does not admit his fate, whether it is a dream or a memory of a previous life, he will not repeat the same mistakes in his life.

    …

    For many days, Jianglu remained silent, thinking about how to deal with it.

    Unexpectedly, the situation is getting worse.

    In the past few days, he would fall into nightmares almost as soon as he fell asleep, and even Jiang Lu realized that he was not performing these dreams from the perspective of a bystander, and he became the person in the dream.

    Whenever I wake up, my memories will become clear bit by bit. He vaguely remembered how Qi Yan made his move, and also recalled his indifferent and indifferent appearance to Qi An’an.

    The panic in his heart is getting deeper and deeper, and the disaster of extinction is right in front of him, as if he can’t escape from the palm of God no matter how hard he struggles.

    *

    “I know what you are talking about. Let me take the liberty to ask, does your family have a history of mental illness?”

    Jiang Lu moved his lips while facing the kind-looking doctor who was wearing a white coat. I know.” The

    doctor nodded: “Okay. From your data, there is nothing wrong with your mental state and all indicators are normal. As for the dream and the memory you said, if you don’t mind, I can talk. Have a chat?”

    Jiang Lu did not speak, the doctor cleared his throat and tentatively asked: “In fact, people often say that they think day by day and dream at night. There is no scientific basis for this. People’s dreams are very complicated. There are all kinds of strange things. Dreams are not enough to support anxiety. It is not uncommon for a person to have the same dream repeatedly, but it is too decisive to determine that this dream will happen in reality.”

    Jiang Lu was silent for a while, low. The voice said: “If so. How do you explain the memory that appears in my brain?”

    “It may be caused by your work pressure, or it may be the environment in which you have been living since childhood, which has caused a certain impact on you. But it may not be called memory, more precisely, it is a certain kind of mentality. Fantasy. And take a step back, your examination results are not abnormal, in fact, don’t worry too much…” The

    doctor smiled, made a relaxed gesture and continued to say the following: “…Suddenly one day you will lose control. Something that goes against the heart will be done, which is impossible. Quantitative changes will cause qualitative changes. There must be a process for the development of everything. Even if the things you worry about will eventually happen, there must be a sign and a process. This It is the result of your examination. No matter what doctor looks at it, you will think you are healthy.”

    Jiang Lu looked down at the examination sheet handed over by the doctor. He had already understood it before he came and understood that there was indeed no problem.

    His eyes drifted a little, such a tall man sitting in a chair showed a kind of helplessness and fragility: “But… even if it’s not a memory… it’s a spiritual fantasy, how could I have such a fantasy?”

    The doctor said, “Don’t be so nervous, with all due respect, you love your wife very much?”

    Jiang Lu’s empty eyes condensed, his eyes gradually fell to the ground, and the corners of his lips curled up in an insignificant arc, he corrected. : “Fiancee.” The

    doctor smiled, “Because of love and worry, you are too strong about this emotion, so when you have a bad dream, your anxiety will be more than normal. Big, you will worry more about the dream itself, which creates a series of vicious circles. Relax, you are fine. If you are really worried, you can come back for a checkup later.”

    Before Jiang Lu left, the doctor reminded: “If this is the case. This kind of situation still occurs, I suggest you go to the psychology department.”

    …

    “Sister Yu Lin, have Jiang Lu having troubles at work recently?”

    Qi An’an and Jiang Lu have been married after living together

She became more idle, and the paper was almost as busy. She went for an internship in her supervisor’s office, but the new year was approaching and her time was relatively free. There was basically nothing to do every day, and her supervisor always took her love leave.

    Qi An’an came back early that day, and after thinking about it, he ran to Jianglu Company to deliver him food. Just entering the door and ran into Yu Lin, Qi An’an stopped her and asked her about her recent worries.

    “I rely on An’an, you are here to deliver food to the boss again, why is the boss such a good blessing? You got such a little baby.” Yu Lin hasn’t taken Qi An’an’s problem to heart yet, her eyes are only on Qi An’an’s hand. Look at the lunch box.

    Qi An’an smiled: “I made it by myself this time. Anyway, I have nothing to do recently. I just learned it at home. If it is delicious, I will bring it to you next time.”

    “No, you don’t need to bring it to me, I Don’t dare.” Yu Lin immediately waved her hand to refuse. She still knew a little bit about her boss. She would eat anyone’s jealousy when she went crazy. She borrowed ten dogs and didn’t dare to eat the food cooked by others’ beloved ones.

    Qi An’an looked around, then lowered her voice and asked, “Sister Yu Lin, has the company encountered any problems recently? Is it serious? If it is convenient, can you mention it to me?”

    She said about these aspects. I don’t know much, but Jiang Lu’s emotions must be wrong recently. Although his face is as gentle and calm as before, she is his closest person. He is unhappy and absolutely can’t hide it from himself.

    Qi An’an is afraid that Jiang Lu is in trouble. If it is really difficult, she can also quietly mention to Qi Yan. Qi Yan is always better than her, and it is better to help Jiang Lu than he is alone. . But asking Jiang Lu definitely couldn’t ask anything, so Qi Anan had to ask Yu Lin.

    Yu Lin looked inexplicable: “Is there nothing in the company recently?” She thought about it, and said happily, “I have to talk about the next two businesses. I have to say that our company is really awesome.”

    Qi An’an There was a thoughtful “Oh”.

    “What’s the matter? Has the boss been in a bad mood recently? I think he is no different from usual. Could it be that he shook your face at you?” Yu Lin’s heart screamed, Jiang Lu is so courageous?

    “No no,” Qi An’an immediately denied with a smile, “How could it be.”

    Yu Lin nodded, “I don’t think it’s possible, it’s okay. Don’t worry about him. Isn’t he like that every day? Cold and taciturn, I I only smiled when I saw you.”

    Although Yu Lin’s performance was very calm, Qi Anan still felt uneasy. She walked up and hesitated, instead of going directly to Jiang Lu, she turned a corner and knocked Yutian. Young’s door.

    “Hey? An An, why are you here?” Yu Tianyang looked up from the desk, “Wow, you actually came to bring me food!”

    “What is for you, this is for Jiang Lu, I came here to think I want to ask you something.” Qi An’an is too familiar with Yu Tianyang, and he is not polite at all.

    Yu Tianyang glanced at his mouth and snorted coldly: “I knew it was for Jiang Lu to tease you. What’s the matter?”

    Qi An’an deliberatedly said, “I feel Jiang Lu is not in a good mood recently, you two The relationship is good, did he mention anything to you?”

    “Is he in a bad mood? I think he is okay, isn’t he always like this? There is nothing wrong with it.” Yu Tianyang was said The two of you have a sore relationship. After thinking about it, I feel that, anyway, his relationship with Jiang Lu is okay.

    But the relationship is good but it reminds him, “What is going on Jiang Lu, just ask him directly?”

    It was a mistake to come to him, Qi An’an sighed, Jiang Lu’s character of telling good news but not bad news, what? Time to show her his troubles?

    “I asked him, he was afraid I was worried, so he would definitely not tell me.”

    “I think you just think too much, really,” Yu Tianyang said with a “harm”, without paying attention: ” An An, did you learn too much professionally to feel Jiang Lu’s emotions? Don’t be nervous, nothing happened recently. I promise, Jiang Lu is still as clear-headed as before. It’s okay. “

    Forget it, Qi An’an thought, he can’t ask anything anymore, she should go to Jiang Lu.

    Jiang Lu had told Qi An’an before that if she didn’t have to knock on the door, she would just push the door in, because sometimes he was engrossed and might not notice the knock on the door.

    Once because of this, Qi Anan waited for him outside for nearly twenty minutes, and almost made him feel bad.

    However, Qi An’an would knock on the door before coming. If Jiang Lu didn’t say please come in, she would push the door directly. This time Qi An’an waited for a while, feeling that Jiang Lu probably didn’t hear her, so she just pushed directly. Closed the door.

    The office is very large, Qi Anan saw Jiang Lu at a glance, he was standing in front of the French window and calling.

    It’s just that the voice is very low, and a few words vaguely float over.

    “Hmm…”

    “Yes, no improvement…”

    “Next week…Next Thursday…” The

    door was halfway open and there was a little rubbing sound. Jiang Lu frowned when he heard the movement, and looked back a little displeased. .

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